ABC – Valentine’s Day

When the postman don`t call on Valentine`s day

And Santa Claus don`t come on a Christmas Day

That umbrella won`t work on a rainy day

Don`t ask me, I already know

When they find you beached on the barrier reef

And the only pleasure treasured is in map relief

The choice is yours, sure, saint or thief

Don`t ask me I already know

When they baked your cake in little slices,

Kept your eyes on rising prices,

Wound up winning booby prizes;

I`m sure you`d like to think you know what life is

Find destiny through magazines

Liplicking, unzipping

Harpers and Queens

From here to eternity,

Without in-betweens,

Don`t ask me, I already know

With your heart on parade and your heart on parole

I hope you find a sucker to buy that mink stole

School for scandal,

Guess who`s enrolled?

So ask me, I already know

When they find you beached on the barrier reef

When the postman don`t call on Valentine`s Day

When the only pleasure treasured is in map relief

When you don`t tell the truth, that`s the price you pay

When I`m shaking a hand, I`m clenching a fist

If you gave me a pound for the moments I missed

And I got dancing lessons for all the lips I shoulda kissed

I`d be a millionaire

I`d be a Fred Astaire